I only have vague recollections of my stint as Mary, mother of Christ. But as family lore has it, my term was a shameful one. I've done little acting work since.
1987
Nativity Play
Small Town, USA
A procession of miniature shepherds lines up behind the door leading to the sanctuary, each donning a bathrobe and carefully draped bath-towel head covering. Some of them carry tall sticks, one carries a stuffed sheep. A hyper host of angels follows, their pipe-cleaner halos bobbling as they wait. The crรจche is always much enlarged to include all of the children; shepherds and angels are naturally suited for plural roles.
Mary, Joseph, and the (lead) angel prepare to enter. Joseph pinches Mary. Mary retaliates. The nativity is read and both take the stage.
The angel tells Mary she is to have a child, but Mary is distracted by the bale of hay that pokes her as she sits. Mary knows that Jesus (who is actually played by her female doll) is stashed behind her seat for scene two. Joseph picks at his sleeve.
Joseph and Mary travel to Bethlehem and Mary retrieves the child from its hiding spot. Twelve shepherds tend to their single flock and seven angels direct them to the stable where the holy family sits pouting. Mary's mother gestures her to straighten up, but Mary ignores the stern looks.
The three wise men enter, also wearing bathrobes. Gold necklaces and gifts distinguish them from the shepherds. Joseph and Mary eyeball the gifts.
The gold jewelry box is handed to Mary. The perfume bottle and pendant are handed to Joseph. Mary wants to have a look at the pendant and tears it from Joseph's hand. Mary's mother turns pale. Joseph and Mary struggle for possession of the pendant and break its chain. The audience chatters. Neither Mary nor Joseph will retreat and the box is the next destroyed prize. Mary's mother gestures, and Mary, slightly embarrassed, lets go.
The child rests peacefully in the manger.
But the play is long. Mary plucks a piece of straw from the bale, holds it like a cigarette, and takes a deep, slow drag. Mary's mother shutters and motions her to stop. Giggles begin to erupt amongst the congregation, and Mary takes the opportunity to up the ante. She bounces her crossed leg and continues to take large, dramatic puffs.
Everyone stands and sings Away in a Manger. A delightful distraction. Mary keeps her eye on her mother.
Small Town, USA
A procession of miniature shepherds lines up behind the door leading to the sanctuary, each donning a bathrobe and carefully draped bath-towel head covering. Some of them carry tall sticks, one carries a stuffed sheep. A hyper host of angels follows, their pipe-cleaner halos bobbling as they wait. The crรจche is always much enlarged to include all of the children; shepherds and angels are naturally suited for plural roles.
Mary, Joseph, and the (lead) angel prepare to enter. Joseph pinches Mary. Mary retaliates. The nativity is read and both take the stage.
The angel tells Mary she is to have a child, but Mary is distracted by the bale of hay that pokes her as she sits. Mary knows that Jesus (who is actually played by her female doll) is stashed behind her seat for scene two. Joseph picks at his sleeve.
Joseph and Mary travel to Bethlehem and Mary retrieves the child from its hiding spot. Twelve shepherds tend to their single flock and seven angels direct them to the stable where the holy family sits pouting. Mary's mother gestures her to straighten up, but Mary ignores the stern looks.
The three wise men enter, also wearing bathrobes. Gold necklaces and gifts distinguish them from the shepherds. Joseph and Mary eyeball the gifts.
The gold jewelry box is handed to Mary. The perfume bottle and pendant are handed to Joseph. Mary wants to have a look at the pendant and tears it from Joseph's hand. Mary's mother turns pale. Joseph and Mary struggle for possession of the pendant and break its chain. The audience chatters. Neither Mary nor Joseph will retreat and the box is the next destroyed prize. Mary's mother gestures, and Mary, slightly embarrassed, lets go.
The child rests peacefully in the manger.
But the play is long. Mary plucks a piece of straw from the bale, holds it like a cigarette, and takes a deep, slow drag. Mary's mother shutters and motions her to stop. Giggles begin to erupt amongst the congregation, and Mary takes the opportunity to up the ante. She bounces her crossed leg and continues to take large, dramatic puffs.
Everyone stands and sings Away in a Manger. A delightful distraction. Mary keeps her eye on her mother.
4 comments:
OMG!
Tears fall as I write this comment!
What lovely memories of that blessed Christmas morn.
NOT! Ha you so recaptured it!
I love you. thanks for the MEMORIES
M.
Happy Mother's Day! Sorry I was naughty...but isn't it funny now!?
I love you!
♥
Brilliant! This is such a hilarious story-it's memories like this that families treasure!
OMG. Hilarious!
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